Last year we redesigned our backyard. However, by the time we were done, it was August and we didn’t get to enjoy much of it during the short New England summer. Yet, what made it really unusable, were all the mosquitoes that came out around the time we would want to enjoy a summer dinner outside. We left scrambling for cover as little blood sucking missiles bombarded us.

This year, we are looking into some sort of mosquito slauder machine. Thus, if you have an affinity for mosquitos and knats, and perhaps belong to PETM (“People for the Ethical Treatment of Mosquitoes) I suggest you don’t read any further as there is a lot of talk about bug carnage in this post.

So on we go then…….

There seems to be two kinds of mosquito eliminators. There are the bug gas chambers, as I call them. Those spray some sort of chemical into the backyard that is supposed to kill and repel the little critters. They can be pretty expensive & I’m not sure about the chemical/environmental aspect. Then there is the bug electric chair (aka bug zapper). We had one growing up and I remember many summer nights playing outdoors while the sound of bugs getting fried filled the air. Ah, the memories. Why should I deprive my kids of that experience?

I went to Amazon.com and started looking at what was available and what has received great reviews. There is one product called the Flowtron. I loved the name since it seems like a cool summer futuristic movie, but what made me look into the product was the fact that it has gotten over 700 reviews and has 4 stars. Hmmm.

One reviewer, Liquify33, refers to the Flowtron as the murder machine, but gave some practical advice and advised to route an extension cord and plug it in where you want to hear bugs being zapped mercilessly.

RenoJ, who proclaims himself to be a Redneck, loves sitting on his southern porch drinking beer in the dark and watching the bug zapper. He even left his beer to write his Amazon review as he was really impressed with the total bug carnage he witnessed while sitting with a cold one.

Chappy was a bit more practical and advised future owners to be prepared for a pile of dead bugs under the zapper, with only occasional need to blow out with an air compressor. (Phew, I was worried about having to clean it.)

F. Rabi gave valuable advice too. S/he suggests putting it away from your seating area because it will attract and kill so many insects that if it is near you, you will get covered. I also like the parenting part of his/her review with the concern that the zapping noises it makes, as it kills, can be intimidating to young kids.

Marty even suggested that Starship Troopers need one of these Flowtrons. (See, I told you it sounded like a movie). He also gave real advice about keeping it away from the seating area since the the zapper can smell a bit when burning the big ones.

Even if the previous reviews haven’t convinced you yet, then this review from Max Mitchell may seal the deal because he finds it great summer entertainment and even pulled up a few lawn chairs and watched it for hours striking bugs to the ground and watching sparks fly. He’s nicknamed his zapper ‘Old Sparky’.

So if you want to experience total bug carnage this summer, this seems to get …errr…..glowing reviews.

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While Charlene really hates mosquitoes, and is seriously considering a bug zapper, this post is not meant to offend any bug lovers or cause mass Mosquito destruction. Okay, well, maybe a little bit on the latter. Charlene does not endorse nor is Charlene under any directive by Flowtron. Though the glowing blue light can be hypnotic. Every family needs to decide if they want to swat, spray, or zap. Or better yet, Charlene suggests just staying indoors all summer in the air conditioning or moving to the city as either option seems more civilized all around.